Authority and it's fault in life

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Raven Song
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Authority and it's fault in life

#1

Post by Raven Song »

So... sigh. Here's the thing.

I am one of the most respectful people on the planet. I understand that people in positions of authority need to be respected, and there are ways to talk to them etc. But... authority takes the mick. Authority often doesn't deserve the respect it demands.

My old boss was a very horrible Dutch man who treated his employees like dirt. while he mostly got away with that in South Africa, when he moved to the UK he continued to try that out and yet... it doesn't fly. I left that country not to be treated like shit. So when he came storming into the barn day and day out making us all feel like shit... well one day I snapped. And thats what I do. I bottle it up until I can't keep quiet any more. So I snapped. I shouted at him and told him everything I felt he was doing wrong. And it wasn't pretty. Some people would say I was lucky to keep my job after that... and yeah maybe I shouldn't have shouted... but you couldn't have a conversation with the man.

My new male boss has a tendency to be the same. He doesn't come in and shout at us all but he mansplains, and he moans. and this isn't right and this isn't good enough and this is shit and blah blah blah. So when I have done a full week of 3 peoples jobs by myself whilst still being a good receptionist and cleaning the yard and and and… and what do I get... told off this morning because the office is a bit of a mess. So.. instead of shouting at him, I bottled it up... until he came and asked something and I snapped a pen. I just... couldn't. I'm tired. I've been working at home to try keep up with the work load every night for the last week. I don't have the energy to be nice any more. And I know he's my boss... but what does he do to deserve that title? He spends money on Lamborghinis that should be going to fixing the property. We earn literally basic wage, and he's running around buying the new iPhone like it's a £5 toy at a corner café.
So I snapped. I get the flack from the clients and the girls. I get the stress and he always says he's going to help but he never actually does.
Now he refuses to come talk to me so I can apologise because I do owe him an apology even if I don't want to apologise.

At what point does authority no longer deserve that respect. This isn't a rant per se, though I have ranted. At what point does the person in a position of authority get held accountable for it. Why is it such a societal norm for people in high positions to get away with treating people "beneath" them so poorly. We are the ones doing the work. We are the ones earning them the money. So why am I the one suffering?
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Rakuen Growlithe
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#2

Post by Rakuen Growlithe »

Well I think there are different ways to approach that question both in respect to whether you are inside or outside of the hierarchy itself and the nature of authority as a whole. But since this is in the cases of bosses, I will limit my thoughts to that context.

The respect that is afforded to an authority comes from many places. There is a basic level of respect which all people are entitled to but then there is a little extra either because of the importance of the organisation itself or because someone in a position of authority is assumed to have done something important. Perhaps they started the company or organisation or worked their way up the ranks. In both those cases, the authority gets respect from what they have done. But no one can demand authority, it is something that is earned. And it's not guaranteed either, one can lose the respect of others because of something that person has done. Exactly what will cause that will differ from person to person and the situation itself. I would also say that authority figures are still just people and they shouldn't be treated differently. If you would lose respect for your co-worker or friend for a certain action, then if your boss does the same action they should lose respect in just the same manner.

I will note that respect is not necessarily a single monolithic concept. It's possible to respect someone's abilities while also thinking they are a terrible human being. To use a fictional example, we could respect Dr House's medical knowledge and insight while condemning him for being a jerk.

Why is it a norm for people in high position to treat others badly? It shouldn't be. People will slip up from time to time but that's obviously very different to it being a pattern of behaviour. I think there are two reasons people can get away with it. Firstly, people put up with it in order to get some other sort of reward. Maybe they are fine with the boss treating them like garbage because it means promotions and more money. I think that's a large motivation at higher levels. For "lower" positions, I think its a flaw of the economic system. In an ideal, flat hierarchy people will have the benefit of free association; you willing come together but if you don't get on with someone you leave them and go somewhere else. That's how our friendships work. The economic system prevents that because people have to have a job because they have to earn an income, so bosses can belittle people without much fear or them leaving and safe in the knowledge that, if they do leave, someone else will come and fill the spot.
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Raven Song
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#3

Post by Raven Song »

So my boss is the owner and he got there by his father in law leaving him the business.

My father worked from a sales person to CEO. That deserves respect.

Not some silly 35 year old who got given a multi million pound business...

Hierarchy has a place but I suppose the pattern through history is hierarchy gets too powerful, little humans rebel.
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#4

Post by Rakuen Growlithe »

Yeah, just being given something is not an achievement. You get a chance then and perhaps some extra respect because your father was a good person but after that, it's up to you. And, if it is as you say it is, then that opportunity seems to have been squandered. The main problem with hierarchies at the moment is they aren't free. There's a huge difference between a person that you choose to follow for whatever reason and one you are forced to follow. Currently too many people are forced to follow "leaders" that they wouldn't otherwise follow or, in some cases, even have anything to do with them.
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#5

Post by Trace »

I'm sorry that you're having to deal with your boss being an idiot... Unfortunately sometimes people we have to deal with everyday are in positions they don't really deserve, and sometimes the best thing to do is just to treat them with respect even if they don't really deserve it.
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#6

Post by Shiro »

I feel your pain. I was doing 2 jobs both conflicting with each other but being payed for only 1. Was expected to be available 24/7 365 and I did not have a single vacation in 4 years letalone a pay rise in that time.

I bottled up all the frustrations and stress of 5 years and just pushed forward till earlier this year and it nearly killed me. I lost a lot of weight during that time (about 15kg) placing me just above 50kg earlier the year.

Feb this year I finally snapped after a skype call with the CEO telling me to put in more effort or have my pay cut in half. I typed out my resignation got in bed and awoke super refreshed the next morning knowing I am done with the nightmare job. Then as I opened my mail there was another Urgent mail telling me to drop my actual work (deadline in 7 days) and to complete the new work ASAP. I attached my resignation letter as a reply, ignored the new urgent work (i did not even open the document in the mail) and continued to do my actual job till the end of the month then walked away not looking back.
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Raven Song
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#7

Post by Raven Song »

I cant leave this job :P not yet. I still have much to learn from it. But I rate if it's still that bad in say... 3 years.. it's time.
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#8

Post by LaShadow »

Old topic. Don't know why I'm reviving it. But yeah, that's probably how the majority of jobs are. My previous job was also disgusting and shit. But that's just jobs in general if you think about it. For every dollar your boss get, you get a dime. Even though you do the tough work. Whether you think of it as profit building or exploitation. It still remains a job and we all have them. Hopefully.

Though I wouldn't rant about what he does with his profit or money. That's for him to decide. Nor crucify him for taking over his dad's business. That's just absurd.
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#9

Post by Raven Song »

LaShadow wrote: Sun Nov 29, 2020 11:11 am Old topic. Don't know why I'm reviving it. But yeah, that's probably how the majority of jobs are. My previous job was also disgusting and shit. But that's just jobs in general if you think about it. For every dollar your boss get, you get a dime. Even though you do the tough work. Whether you think of it as profit building or exploitation. It still remains a job and we all have them. Hopefully.

Though I wouldn't rant about what he does with his profit or money. That's for him to decide. Nor crucify him for taking over his dad's business. That's just absurd.
You can criticise people who take on multimillion businesses and use it to line their own pocket and not give the people or animals that got that money for them anything other than the bare basics back in return.

Just because that is the way majority of jobs are like that does not make it right. In fact it makes it even worse!!! Corporations and businesses who use and abuse the people who work for them should not be allowed, should not be the norm and it should be fought and contested by everyone. Look at the stuff thats happening on Wall Street. The world is shifting and if we want it to be better for us and the next generation then we need to sort it!!!
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Re: Authority and it's fault in life

#10

Post by LaShadow »

But that's the thing. The wonder of having a free economy is that we can choose who to work for/not. We can decide who to buy stuff from or use their services from. if a company is neglecting it's workers or consumers. People do stop sponsoring them. It's called voting with your wallets.
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