ZA Furries

Half-Gemini

In the early hours of the coldest morning, something within my mind stirred
When within its darkest recesses, the haunting sound of your voice was heard
Echo resonating down the passages of a once-upon-a-time
Phantom of a love-sick poem we made that could never rhyme

And I see your face again, but your voice never says goodbye
A broken record, only memories repeated in your cry
Always singing the tragic song of a heart broken, awry
Why must you linger in my blackest dreams, why?

My heart is rescued as light breaks over the horizon
And blue and gold saturate the dawn sky the bird now flies in
But when the night reappears and from the grey cloud peeks the moon
Your ghost will re-emerge from memories’ halls, your nostalgic croon

And I shall see your face again, but your voice won’t say goodbye
Still a broken record, only memories will be repeated in your cry
Still singing the tragic song of a heart further broken, awry
Will you linger forever in my sweetest dreams, half-Gemini?

Hmm. It's very well written. I especially enjoy the rhyming scheme used and it flows rather nicely. I.e. there is never a sentence that feels too short or too long in comparison to the previous. (At least in my opinion.) The copy, but subtle change, in the text from the second stanza to the last was well executed and it made for a great read.

My only nitpick was the line "Why must you linger in my blackest dreams, why?" simply due to the double use of 'Why' not 'feeling' right as I read it, as though it was just put there to rhyme with the other lines. But it is a nitpick on my part so it can be ignored and it doesn't influence the piece at all.

As for the content itself... well, that's a little tricky. Poetry, or abstract writing in general, is something that can go over many heads, simply because for it to mean anything, there needs to be a spark with the reader. An emotional connection. Which can make a lot of really eloquent pieces remain unnoticed simply because no-one who read it felt anything for it.

And... If I may be a little frank, there's no such spark or sudden realization that hits 'me' personally after reading it. (Though that could just be my stupidity not making it able to. :P) But it does pique a little curiosity. May I ask what this piece means to you?

Thank you for your feedback and for reading, Cyn. It is unfortunate that there was no spark, but I guess not everyone can relate to any one poem. Still, I am at least glad you took the trouble of reading.

I hope I didn't come across as too rude. If I did, I really didn't mean to.

May I ask what this piece means to you?

Another question of mine going to be ignored? That's harsh. :P

Though the poem was inspired by a sequence of events in my life, I'd prefer not to elaborate - at least not publicly - and instead leave the meaning up to the interpretation of the reader.

So stupid people like me will never get it? :(

I guess all I can say is I hope there's a silver lining somewhere by the end of the story. Given what I can grasp...

..if what I'm grasping isn't air. :v

Congratulations on a poem well written.

Very well done! That was refreshing in a way I'm unable to put my finger on. I look forward to reading more of your poems.

I really liked that poem, Galahad. Very well done.
'Half-Gemini' is a pretty wonderful bit of imagery that really ties the whole thing together.

I think it's beautiful, although my interpretation may be a little too specific to share.

Cape, Nasheera, Trace and Lee - thank you very much for your kind words and taking the time to read it. I appreciate it. I hope not to disappoint with my next poem or short story.

Defying Death
In honour of my Grandfather and his fighting spirit

Once again he comes in the stillness of the night
Yet his deathly white facade is not a new sight
Through the hallways his black figure stalks
All life drains amid the path he walks
"I have come to visit you again, old friend"
He taunts, "Your journey has now come to its end."

"Your body is old, your strength is dying
Your skin is ash-grey, your soul is crying
Your fate is sold, the odds are mounting
You shan't see day, on this I'm counting."

Upon his deathbed, the old man lay
Four hours separated him and day
With a steely gaze, he looked upon Death's face
And the man raised his head from its resting place

"And so you have returned, Death my friend.
You have come here to bring me to my end.
But your scythe would be best left undrawn
For you will not stop me from reaching dawn."

A hideous cackle echoed throughout the hallway
"Who are you to deny me, little being of clay?
Greater men have died for less, lesser men for more"
A shuddering creak sounded as Death opened the door
Death stepped into the room, wearing a wicked grin
There was no time left to atone for any past sin

"You are just another creature I have come to claim.
I distinguish not between them, you are all the same.
Now surrender your strength, the time has come.
All that you were will be totalled to its sum."

Slowly, Death strode up to the side of the old man's bed
He lifted his scythe to bring it down upon another head
Yet an old, grey hand thrust out and gripped the hilt
A hand from an aged body the world had left to wilt

"I do not fear Death, nor do I allow him to determine my end!
But if this is my last breath, I will break before I bend!
If to the waters of the Styx you must take me, be prepared!
I will be the first to make Death himself beg to be spared!"

Even in a trying time your words are most beautiful and stirring my utahraptor friend.
A piece of honour indeed.

All I can do is echo the words of the Wolf above me.
Beautifully written, Galahad.

A.I

I do not belong in this body of flesh and bone
In this sea of human faces, I am but a drone
The offspring of binary digits, rather than man
The fruitage of a mortal designer's heartless plan


In the air, a fine mist settles as rainclouds swallow sunshine
Upon a puddle's surface, there is the face said to be mine
As I peer deeper, something registers behind those green eyes
No, pay no heed! There is no spark behind my human disguise
But what if I wanted to be something greater, something more
Than a robot machined and crafted on a factory floor?
What if I wanted to feel love from a kiss, heartbreak from a lie
Rather than feel naught but the heartless impulsions of an A.I?


Onwards I try to walk (But did you so quickly forget?)
Quiet, thoughts! Do not talk! (Perhaps your mind was never set?)
I am not human, never could be (You and I both know otherwise)
Through their warm eyes, I could never see (Do away with these heartless lies!)


Is it against reality, or against my own delusions I have sparred?
I look away, back to the reflection, and see a more human facade
No longer do I want to be a slave to the code written for me
Something more, something greater, something else, I want to be
A heart within me beats, I feel something beneath my skin
I smile, and with joy my mind begins to race and spin


I have buried the hatred, hurt and lies
And look upon the world with human eyes

Well done, Galahad...
That is wonderfully written.

Ahhh I love it! Well written, Mr Dino! =3

Thank you.

---

Gravity

The greater the mass, the greater the pull
Is what the teacher taught us in school
But something that was never told to me
Was that my mistakes had their own gravity
Overtime, together, they would coalesce
My fear of them only to myself I'd confess
Every night, the monster's pull became stronger
Every night, the distance I'd have to run became longer
I feel its pull, I feel its force
A grip so cold and coarse
I fight back, kick, and escape
But there it will wait, maw agape
For the night to come, one without moon
When I lose the ability to run, for it to consume