Thoughts on the furry fandom 2.0... and an explanation
Posted: Tue Jul 18, 2017 9:36 am
I know this isn't exactly the best place to post this, but I didn't want to put it in V&S where only members can read it. I specifically wanted to go public because people I've never heard of contacted me out of the blue about my last post (viewtopic.php?f=13&t=4768) so I wanted them to be able to read the long overdue follow-up.
Yes, I'm aware that it's not just the furry fandom that has bad apples, it's humanity as a whole. That doesn't invalidate the fact that due to its appeal to younger audiences the fandom is a convenient medium for predators. This is real, and it has happened; there's nothing you can do about it. The damage has been done, it's too late. The furry fandom's reputation has been tainted forever. Chanting #NotAllFurries and taking it personally when people bring it up just makes you look like an imbecile in denial. It's like trying to reclaim the swastika for its original meaning: you'll never pull it off because literally everyone associates it with the Nazi regime (inb4 Nazi furs).
I'm also aware that furries appear to have a higher than average proportion of people with mental health issues, and that this is largely due to furries being very open about themselves, unlike the general population, because society has put stigmas on everything that is not the (statistical) norm. But here's what irks me: it's great to empower yourself by declaring that your quirks are part of who you are, but it's something else entirely to wear it like a badge of honour and let it define your entire identity. That's what makes furries so groan inducing, to me at least.
Just for the record, the only one who was perceptive enough to realise/guess that something was off with me without knowing the context for it was Animew. He is a hell of a lot wiser than he likes to appear. I tip my hat to you kitty, you were spot on in everything you said.
Anyway, none of this matters, because I still love the concept of furry, and probably always will. I just don't have the drive to search the fandom for a feeling of belonging any more. Maybe because I got hurt by caring too much, I don't know.
I apologise for all the outbursts and anger I've expressed towards undeserving bystanders. The reasons have nothing to do with you guys, so I am sincerely sorry that I subjected you to them.
To make my intentions perfectly clear: this is not a "I'm leaving ZAFur furevar!" but a "I don't feel like making an effort any more." I'm leaving the door open to become a regular user here again at some point, but honestly I don't see that happening, so don't count on my activity being any more than occasional. I'm no longer interested in engaging with the community just for the sake of it.
However, I'll honour my commitment and keep The Furnace burning. I started something I believe could be worthwhile with a little effort, and I intend to see it through. Once the dust has settled I'll poke the ashes for embers and throw on some fuel.
I also intend to re-open my little shop Leeworks Gear once I have a proper workshop, which will only be in January when we move into our new place. I simply don't have to room to lay out my tools and sewing machine right now.
About 2 months ago, my brother died of pancreatic cancer. I'll spare you the details, in fact I don't really want to share them here, so let me just say that it was very painful, tragically ironic, and unleashed some rather gargantuan closet skeletons.
I've also just finished going through a rather intense 6-month long medical weight loss programme. Being a bit of a foodie and a hedonist when it comes to the simple pleasures in life, this was torture. But it's over now, and 20 fewer kilograms later I feel great. Now onto the real challenge: keeping the weight off.
I'm also nearing the end of the process of weaning myself off antidepressants, which as some of you may know is a roller coaster ride so crazy it might even scare Franky (whom by the way I forgot to mention in my last post, sorry dude).
I've come to a lot of realisations about myself recently. I've taken some distance from the internet in general, and it has done me a lot of good reconnecting with reality. I intend to keep it that way, for now at least.
In other news, yesterday was me and my partner's 7th anniversary. I made a leap of faith, and proposed... he said yes.
That's all for now. See you guys around, I guess. You know where to find me.
Yes, I'm aware that it's not just the furry fandom that has bad apples, it's humanity as a whole. That doesn't invalidate the fact that due to its appeal to younger audiences the fandom is a convenient medium for predators. This is real, and it has happened; there's nothing you can do about it. The damage has been done, it's too late. The furry fandom's reputation has been tainted forever. Chanting #NotAllFurries and taking it personally when people bring it up just makes you look like an imbecile in denial. It's like trying to reclaim the swastika for its original meaning: you'll never pull it off because literally everyone associates it with the Nazi regime (inb4 Nazi furs).
I'm also aware that furries appear to have a higher than average proportion of people with mental health issues, and that this is largely due to furries being very open about themselves, unlike the general population, because society has put stigmas on everything that is not the (statistical) norm. But here's what irks me: it's great to empower yourself by declaring that your quirks are part of who you are, but it's something else entirely to wear it like a badge of honour and let it define your entire identity. That's what makes furries so groan inducing, to me at least.
Just for the record, the only one who was perceptive enough to realise/guess that something was off with me without knowing the context for it was Animew. He is a hell of a lot wiser than he likes to appear. I tip my hat to you kitty, you were spot on in everything you said.
Anyway, none of this matters, because I still love the concept of furry, and probably always will. I just don't have the drive to search the fandom for a feeling of belonging any more. Maybe because I got hurt by caring too much, I don't know.
I apologise for all the outbursts and anger I've expressed towards undeserving bystanders. The reasons have nothing to do with you guys, so I am sincerely sorry that I subjected you to them.
To make my intentions perfectly clear: this is not a "I'm leaving ZAFur furevar!" but a "I don't feel like making an effort any more." I'm leaving the door open to become a regular user here again at some point, but honestly I don't see that happening, so don't count on my activity being any more than occasional. I'm no longer interested in engaging with the community just for the sake of it.
However, I'll honour my commitment and keep The Furnace burning. I started something I believe could be worthwhile with a little effort, and I intend to see it through. Once the dust has settled I'll poke the ashes for embers and throw on some fuel.
I also intend to re-open my little shop Leeworks Gear once I have a proper workshop, which will only be in January when we move into our new place. I simply don't have to room to lay out my tools and sewing machine right now.
About 2 months ago, my brother died of pancreatic cancer. I'll spare you the details, in fact I don't really want to share them here, so let me just say that it was very painful, tragically ironic, and unleashed some rather gargantuan closet skeletons.
I've also just finished going through a rather intense 6-month long medical weight loss programme. Being a bit of a foodie and a hedonist when it comes to the simple pleasures in life, this was torture. But it's over now, and 20 fewer kilograms later I feel great. Now onto the real challenge: keeping the weight off.
I'm also nearing the end of the process of weaning myself off antidepressants, which as some of you may know is a roller coaster ride so crazy it might even scare Franky (whom by the way I forgot to mention in my last post, sorry dude).
I've come to a lot of realisations about myself recently. I've taken some distance from the internet in general, and it has done me a lot of good reconnecting with reality. I intend to keep it that way, for now at least.
In other news, yesterday was me and my partner's 7th anniversary. I made a leap of faith, and proposed... he said yes.
That's all for now. See you guys around, I guess. You know where to find me.